Tag Archive | Breast cancer

The Act of Giving

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LOVE IS GIVING

Good morning everybody!

First of all I’d like to thank you all from the bottom of my heart for liking my blog.

I am lucky to have been given the opportunity to change many negative things in my life. The last weeks were a time of transformation and learning in the deepest of ways. I am always amazed at the precious lessons that just come when one is truly ready.

One of these is the act of giving. Are you a giving person? Or do you expect people to give first, before you do something in return? Think about it…And most importantly, does it come from the heart?

Growing up poor, I never had much, but I remember always giving everything I had. I shared gladly and never expected anything in return. When I look back, I think that is one of the reasons, why I received so much fortune in my adult life. However, over the years my attitude changed and somewhere along the way, I lost this incredible act of giving.

During the time when I was having what I call “my 5 minutes with cancer” (that my reference to it), I experienced an incredible amount of love and giving from friends, who gave without even thinking about it. Friends who bathed me when I couldn’t raise my arms, who stayed with me when I was afraid of being alone, friends that drove me to my appointments when I was weak or friends who took me to the hospital in the middle of the night, when I couldn’t breath. Those were acts of giving, that I will never forget.

This world has turned into a selfish one, where people are only thinking about what they can get out of any situation. It’s a “me, me, me” society. Few give without expecting in return, not knowing that that is the key to living a plentiful life. When you begin to make giving a part of your life, just for the act of giving and not for the act of receiving, your life will take a dramatic change. Why? Because when you give from your heart, you make lots of room to receive. It’s like if you have a handful of peanuts in your hands. If you hold on to them all the time, then you will never have space to receive more peanuts. I know it’s a simple example, but that is just they way it is.

So today’s challenge: Do something nice for someone you care about, just because you want to and just because your heart tells you to. Whether it’s a phone call with loving words, some flowers or maybe baking them a cake. I’m sure that you will feel wonderful because you’ve made someone smile and feel special…and that my friends is one of the most incredible feelings, you can experience living here, right now on this amazing planet.

Much love,

Daisy

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One Year After My Diagnosis

Hi Guys!

Here I am reporting to you one year after my breast cancer diagnosis. First of all, I want to express my deepest gratitude for still being here on this wonderful planet, on this wonderful journey that keeps getting more and more interesting as time passes by. So many emotional, soul touching experiences and changes.

Wow my hair is so long now! 

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In this one year I have become another person. When I look back at what this journey did to me, I can truly say that I don’t regret one single moment of this illness. If I wouldn’t have gotten it, I would still be in the same situation and doing the same shit I did for many years and this, my friends, was stressing out myself as well as my loved ones. Planning my life, worrying about what could go wrong and making everyone responsible when things didn’t turn out the way I wanted them to be.

I got upset about things, that today seem so insignificant and so small. I sowed the seeds of self-hatred, dissatisfaction and self-destruction and then passed them on to others. Of course, the whole time not being aware of the damage I was doing to my body and soul.

Getting breast cancer was the only way to get the message thru to me. I guess. Because of this experience, I was given a new chance. A chance to see life thru a different set of eyes. Now I can stop and smell the daisies. I can enjoy the sun caressing my skin and the wind kissing my face. I can feel life pulsating thru my whole body and for this I am so grateful.

I can leave the dishes in the sink, an unmade bed, the crumbs on the floor, the water spots on the mirror and the messy pillow arrangement on the couch and guess what? Life still goes on and everyone still loves me exactly the way I am. Can you believe this? Well, sometimes I can’t because just one year ago, I thought that if I wasn’t perfect, then nobody would like me. What a ridiculous thought! But, yes, that is the way it was back then. And because I wasn’t perfect, someone had to pay for my unhappiness.

Right now I feel so blessed and although I don’t know, if I will be there in one year, what I know for sure, is that I will go on taking in every single moment of this precious life. I won’t waste one second of my time living in the past or in the future. I will live right now in this moment. I will live in the present and suck in all the beauty and all the magic that this wonderful life has to give. I will be good to myself and to others. I will share and enjoy the love and the patience and the understanding that came to me at the moment when I let go of my old self and embraced a new me.

Much love!

Daisy

P.S. Happy Birthday Dad. Wish you were here!

My Cancer Erasing Tips

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Smilies save my life!

Yes, I want you to take good look at this picture of me. It was a while ago, but heck I was looking pretty that day. It was mother’s day and I had just eaten lunch with my son. No one in the restaurant noticed that underneath the wig, I was bald as an eagle. No one noticed the permanent make-up on my brows. No one saw a woman who was having a rendezvous with cancer. Now, I do use this word “Rendezvous” deliberately, because I have banned all negative terminology when it comes to dealing with cancer. And now I’ll explain why.

We always use these, in my opinion, awful words like killing and fighting against cancer. Hell, that just makes me depressed. I don’t want any killing going on in my body. Why can’t we concentrate on words like promoting health or finding ways to help the cancer to go into remission? I, from the beginning of my encounter with cancer until now, never saw it as something negative in my life. I accepted the fact, that I had to deal with it and chose to do it in a positive way. I knew that my body was asking for help and that I had to change something in my life.

So I’m going to tell you what I did and still do. Every night as I lay in my warm and cuddly bed, I close my eyes and visual my immune system cells being smilies :). Yes, these cute little creatures, that sure do put a smile on my face. I picture them bouncing around my body, looking for those unhappy cancer cells. Those, who just couldn’t help it, after all the years of being inundated with negative feelings like anger, hate and bitterness and eventually got sick. So I see these smilies bouncing up and down and then as they come into contact with cancer cells, I literally see them hugging the unhappy cells to death. As they are being hugged, they fall into a deep sleep and just disappear into air. This picture makes me smile, because it’s filled with love and positive energy. After doing this, I fall asleep felling really happy.

There are so many studies, that prove that your thoughts have a great influence on your body chemistry. Does anyone read this stuff? I mean our bodies are amazing. Genuine wonders! I truly believe that a body has the power to heal itself. I mean, it always has. If we get a cut, then it heals all by itself. We don’t have to tell it to close the wound. Our bodies function perfectly for all of our lives. We never have to concentrate on repairing cells because it just does it automatically. So why question our bodies when something like cancer shows up? How about accepting it and learning the lesson that it’s trying to show you.

Other things that I believe are wonderful, when it comes to dealing with cancer are meditation and exercise. They have really helped me to feel healthy and stay happy all through my, as I call it “10 Minutes with Cancer”. I recently saw a report about how cancer cells live from sugar in our bodies. It’s called “Feed a cold, starve a cancer“. Since then, I’ve been eating very low carb and feel incredibly energetic. I thought it would be harder for me, because hell I’m just a chocolate freak. I sure do love eating this stuff. But, I don’t stress myself out. I just go with the flow and see where this incredible journey is taking me.

Funny enough as I’m writing, a picture of my favorite dessert “Death by Chocolate” just popped into my head. Now that would be my way to go. Hahaha.

Keep smiling!!!

Daisy

Acceptance is the key

How do I go on when life gets really hard?

The first step is acceptance…I know this may sound hard. And it is. But if you can come to the point, where you truly believe that everything happens for a reason, you are on the right track. Yes, it easier said than done. But it is possible. It is in the moment, when you realize that the only thing that is really, really sure, is change. Everything always changes, nothing ever stays the same. You have to truly believe with all your heart, that you deserve something better. Sometimes we cling to the old because it’s comfortable and because we are afraid of change. Believe me I can speak from experience. But I can guarantee, that if you start taking care of you’re own needs rather than waiting for a man or anyone to do this, then things will change. When you realize that you have to love yourself before anyone can love you back. When you follow your bliss and do things that make you smile. Whatever that may be. When you are kind and loving to yourself and realize that you are the most important person on this planet. Forget about the past for its is done. You did your best. Everybody did the best that they could at that given moment. Forget about the future because life comes like it comes. Ask most people who plan things. Accept this moment, even if its painful and know deep in your heart, that it will get better in the moment you let go and let happen.

Why do we spend so much time in the past?

If you are going back over your life, focusing on the difficulties of the past, you are just projecting more difficulties into the now. If there’s one wonderful thing that you can do for yourself now, then letting go of the past would have to be it. Yes, I know how difficult this is because I’ve been there.

foto.jpg Spending my time lamenting, hating, being in a state of anger at people or events or even regretting things I didn’t say in the past. What I realized over the years was that doing this prevented me from enjoying this moment and from seeing the little but wonderful things in life. If you are spending most of the time reliving events of the past, you are missing out on what’s going on in front of your face. Also, if you are holding on to negative feelings or blaming someone, then you are taking it all with you into the present and harming yourself. Think about it!. Maybe this could haven been a moment that was important for you, a moment that would have given you a clue as how to go on, or maybe to change something. Maybe someone smiled at you, but you didn’t see it, because you were mad about the past. So, you just missed it. Isn’t that a shame?

How do you start? Well, how about right away, knowing that I truly believe in you! I started reminding myself every single day to remain in the present and since then everything changed for me. At first it was hard and I often had to bring myself to this moment like most of the day. But, as time went on, it became easier and these days I’m living about 90% in the present. I now see and am so grateful for the many splendid things that where there before, but I just couldn’t see. Simple things, like finally seeing the true color of  my friends’ eyes or the beautiful daisy’s growing just across the road. Funny enough, they were always there, waiting for me to take in their beauty. They waited patiently for me. Life is wonderful!

Why are we so afraid of death?

It is because we’ve lived a life full of sin and are afraid of judgment, when we come to the pearly gates? Or because we want to hold on to the people or to material things that we now have? It is because we haven’t done everything we planned? For of religious reasons? Whatever the reason may be, I’m here to tell you that it’s time, to let go of the fear and the negative feelings associated with it.

We all know that eventually everyone has to die. That’s a given. Change and death are the only sure things in this life. So why not accept it as something totally normal? Like brushing your teeth everyday. I know that what I’m saying may sound hard for some, but if we accept what is part of life, then we can let go and enjoy the time that we have left. We all know that we don’t necessarily have to be sick to die. This can happen at any time, any day in the presence of lots of different circumstances.

A dear friend of mine was clinically dead after a heart operation. Fortunately, the doctors brought her back and she was able talk to me about it. She described it as one of the most beautiful experiences she’s ever had. She also saw this light that people talk about and felt incredible feelings of warmth and love. We’ve all heard about these experiences sometime right? This was a breaking point for me in my life. I realized that when we accept it, then the fear starts to disappear.

I also knew a guy, who drowned 3 times while she was deep-sea diving. He also described the experience as being wonderful. He had always said, that if he had to die, drowning would be the way. Sounds horrible! But no, for him it was a wonderful experience. I remember the feeling of peace that vibrated out of him as he told me his story. He said that he saw his life flash through his eyes, also saw the light and had feelings of utter peace and love.

I’m really fortunate to have these people in my life, because they showed me that there is absolutely no reason to be afraid of dying. Of course, we will miss out on a lot of things and won’t see the people we love anymore. Can I share a secret with you? We do remain alive and that is in the hearts of the people who love us. So we won’t be able to eat chocolate and drink wine or see the sunset again. So my question now is: What the hell are you waiting for? Do these things NOW!!!! Do the things that make you happy. Meet the people who make you smile! Give someone a hug! Stop thinking about the past or about the future. Invest your energy and time in the NOW. For that’s the only thing that you’ve got.